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The Magazine of The Evangelical Lutheran Church in America

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Tough decisions

Hope, pain and moving on after pregnancy attempts

When we started assisted reproductive technology treatments, our doctor suggested we be gentle with ourselves. We were excited to have our own little person. Surprisingly, many of our friends were experiencing infertility too, and we were grateful for their support.

We researched: My husband, Doug Kenshol, wanted the “consumer reports” of medications and success rates. I wanted personal stories. I got them—and heard things I wanted to hear and some I didn’t.

Doug Kenshol and Amy Wiegert
Doug Kenshol and Amy Wiegert of Chicago long to be parents, “not necessarily pregnant.” After failed attempts at assisted reproductive technologies, they are starting the adoption process.
During early testing, my husband and I discussed multiple births and other issues. The clinic showed us forms for in vitro fertilization—about guardianship of extra embryos should we die or who would get them in a divorce. This was more than we could think about.

We worked closely with the doctors to not overstimulate my ovaries so we could avoid becoming pregnant with too many kids. That meant daily ultrasounds. Planning ahead became impossible. A colleague graciously presided at a funeral because I needed to take tests at a specific time. “Come in Wednesday,” the nurse had said on the phone, “then on Thursday we’ll tell you if you need to come in Saturday or Sunday.”


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April issue

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Faith traditions

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